Blood Tears

Left alone, abandoned for simply being who I am.

Forsaken… cursed…I feel like I am the king of the damned.

I sit here pondering why? I have never felt so empty & deprived of a human touch.

I have prayed, tried & hell I have even cried.  I no longer strive to pretend 2 be proud & such.

I have watched as the tears have slowly turned red where my sheets are now stained with my blood.

I guess that’s what happens when U live in a world without love.

The reflection in the mirror is a reflection of lies.

But although I’m still walking around most of me has already died.

I count the days until I will be at peace & free of this mortal vessel

Yet I am still here day after day with this pain I continually wrestle.

I seem to sleep less & less everyday, how much longer can I continue along this path

I ponder did I do something really wrong that I am subjected to God’s wrath

I reach out to people esp. the ones I see who are struggling & in pain.

I want them to know they aren’t alone & perhaps one day we’ll be cleanse by a heavenly rain

However it so hard 4 me to see green when all I see is blue

Dismissed as a negative by those who choose not to see that my pain continues to accrue.

It’s all good, well actually it really isn’t, but I’ll put my pain to paper while I suffer in silence

I should get an Oscar since this has been a stellar performance.

Hiding the pain just below the surface that few will ever see.

After I’m gone… I doubt that I’ll even be remembered just a forgotten memory

©2009

Unknown's avatar

Author: DC

A walking contradiction... What you see isn’t what you get. To get to know the essence you need to open the book and read. An enigma; giving, selfless, conceited, arrogant, loner, author, friend, confidant, trainer, model, actor, and life coach. It really depends on your relationship with him. To someone who doesn’t know him or decides to judge the book by the cover; he is viewed as conceited, arrogant or even mean. Which is the exact opposite of who he is. He’s more of a shy introvert around those he doesn’t know or isn’t comfortable with. Get below the quiet exterior and you’ll find a heart that, to know is to love. He tries to live his life literally walking in love. He would give the shirt off his back to help. Raised by his mother, with no role model on what a man should be. He set out to be different than what he saw in the community. Men who abandoned their responsibilities to pursue whatever tickled their fancy was the norm. These men didn’t care about the damage caused by their selfish actions. He thought the road would be easy, but alas, it proved him wrong. Society had changed dramatically in a short time. People seemed to perceive his love as a weakness. Or perhaps they had not come across a person, who accepts them for them. Always waiting for the other shoe to drop, they tried to manipulate a gift to their advantage. Left alone most of the time, he started to set his pain to print. Never intending for anyone to read it. However, God had a different plan in mind. He would use DC’s pain to show the women; that there are men out there, who do feel profoundly deeper than they think. To reach out to the masses that don’t know how to get others to understand what they are dealing with or have dealt with. He simply wanted to help people on a larger scale.

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