Lonely Blue…

You’re gone & with you a piece of my heart you took. 

I didn’t see that coming so my reality to the core you shook. 

At first I blamed you for leaving alone. 

But I now realize you don’t know how to react when real love is shown.  

I haven’t come across anyone who knows how to receive unconditional love.  Now my pain is like the cries of a dove. 

Torment that should not be faced solo. 

I tried to get people to love me so what else can I do, I surely don’t know. 

If God meant us to be solitary beings would He have created us to desire relations? 

Disagree find me one person who exists alone in all of creation. 

To find just one shouldn’t feel like an eternity. 

Or maybe it’s just me, a defect straight from the factory. 

I don’t know anybody else who spends most of their time in solitary confinement that isn’t locked in jail. 

See there is yet another reason for my faith in Jesus cause it already feels like I’m living in hell. 

I desire not to feel pain worse than this. 

I can count the times on one hand that I’ve experienced bliss. 

My Heavenly home is just a dream away. 

I cannot wait for the day He brings me to Him to stay. 

Heaven on earth is just a fallacy, a myth, a dream a heart breaking fantasy. 

I have a child in me that just refuses to die. 

However this is the part of me that keeps getting hurt & wondering why? 

Why do people think if you show them love then they can walk all over you?  Don’t they know love comes from Him?  Jesus came unto His own & they knew Him not. 

You rejected the love I offered you, yet it still won’t stop. 

The tears flow throughout the years, am I so close to God that I’m constantly under attack & why I don’t really sleep?

Am I just another tragedy …a sad lost sheep?

©2002

 

Written after watching Roommates, I am Sam, AI.  A day spent alone while my back was hurt from working out.

 

Unknown's avatar

Author: DC

A walking contradiction... What you see isn’t what you get. To get to know the essence you need to open the book and read. An enigma; giving, selfless, conceited, arrogant, loner, author, friend, confidant, trainer, model, actor, and life coach. It really depends on your relationship with him. To someone who doesn’t know him or decides to judge the book by the cover; he is viewed as conceited, arrogant or even mean. Which is the exact opposite of who he is. He’s more of a shy introvert around those he doesn’t know or isn’t comfortable with. Get below the quiet exterior and you’ll find a heart that, to know is to love. He tries to live his life literally walking in love. He would give the shirt off his back to help. Raised by his mother, with no role model on what a man should be. He set out to be different than what he saw in the community. Men who abandoned their responsibilities to pursue whatever tickled their fancy was the norm. These men didn’t care about the damage caused by their selfish actions. He thought the road would be easy, but alas, it proved him wrong. Society had changed dramatically in a short time. People seemed to perceive his love as a weakness. Or perhaps they had not come across a person, who accepts them for them. Always waiting for the other shoe to drop, they tried to manipulate a gift to their advantage. Left alone most of the time, he started to set his pain to print. Never intending for anyone to read it. However, God had a different plan in mind. He would use DC’s pain to show the women; that there are men out there, who do feel profoundly deeper than they think. To reach out to the masses that don’t know how to get others to understand what they are dealing with or have dealt with. He simply wanted to help people on a larger scale.

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